


The Sun Loves Only Too Late

by iamthemoon



Category: Bandom, Cobra Starship, Fall Out Boy, I Don't Know How But They Found Me (Band), Panic! at the Disco
Genre: M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-13
Updated: 2018-12-10
Packaged: 2019-06-26 18:00:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,477
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15668361
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iamthemoon/pseuds/iamthemoon
Summary: ryan had it good, his perfect cookie cutter life, save for a few punches now and thenhe parties on the weekends, the perfect little party boy, hidden within his friendsbrendon enters his life, while he's sweet everyone knows what he isa fag doesn't belong in ryan's group, not one like brendon at least





	1. Chapter 1

Ryan smiles humorlessly at his dad, the usual onslaught of jabs and jokes about how Ryan looked too feminine, how he was too gay looking, how he couldn’t do anything well. It’s not like   
Ryan was in hockey and one of the best musicians of the school.  
It’s not like he had an adorable girlfriend who absolutely adored him and his father. It’s not like he made it onto the AB honor roll. It’s not like any of that was happening, Just how he was a failure.  
He finally finishes his food, standing up hard enough his chair knocks against the shelf. He carries his mug and plate to the sink, leaving them there for the moment. He’d wash them after school, he pushes his chair in and rushes to get his backpack. His hair prickles and he quickly turns, his dad close behind him. “Do well. I don’t want you to have a shit career son.” He ruffles Ryans hair then walks to finish his coffee.  
Ryan walks out, walking down to the corner of the street where Spencer would pick him up, the boy pulling up almost immediately. “Hi Ryspoon.” He teases as he pushes open the passenger door. “Spencer if you say it one more time I will shove a spoon where it definitely shouldn’t go.” Ryan threatens. “Sheesh.” Spencer starts driving, slowing down as Brendon rides by on his bike. “Brendon wanna get in?” He asks over Ryan. “Nahh I’m good! Its nice out!” The hyper boy responds, cycling off. “He’s so strange.” Ryan comments, Spencer snorts and nods, stopping to pick up Jac. She plants a kiss to Ryans lips as she slides in, her blonde hair now streaked with pink. “Hey gorgeous.” He smiles at her, eyes adoring as he watches the adorable girl.  
“Hi babe. I like the eyeliner.” She messes with his hair a bit as Spencer drives, fake gagging. “Shut up Spencer. Just cause no one loves you doesn’t mean you gotta ruin ours.” Ryan jokes, nudging the boy affectionately, Spencer laughing in response as he pulls into the school parking lot.   
Jac is the first to get out, half dragging Ryan out to get a proper kiss. His arms wrap around her dainty waist, one hand resting on her hip as he rocks her just a bit in the kiss, her fingers threading in his hair. “Good lord are they eating face?” Brendon asks as he walks up, standing next to an obviously judgmental Spencer. “Basically. It was worse on Halloween, they had fake blood all over. Murder scene.” He says to the boy who crinkles his nose. “That wasn’t the only scene that night.” Ryan smirks as he pulls back, Brendon choking on his water and Spencer groaning loudly.  
“See you later baby.” Ryan says softly, his eyes softening as Jac pecks his cheek. She runs off inside for her first class, Ryan turns back to the guys, frowning at Brendon who grins at him and taps his bottom lip. “Nice color Ryan.” He teases, Ryans cheeks flaring as he wipes his mouth, damnit Jac.  
They walk inside, Brendon going off to his locker. He bounced a bit with each step, almost like he was skipping. Honestly they had no clue how he ended up in their friend group besides his musical talents. He was a talented guitar player and so fucking cheerful at band practice it was hard to be annoyed.  
Speaking of the band, Ryan stands on his toes searching for their greasy bass player, bingo. Making some girl uncomfortable, of course. Spencer goes to grab him as Ryan opens his locker, shoving his extra shit in it as well as his hoodie. He had a sweatshirt in his locker fo the hoodie ban rule.  
A big hand lands on his back, the skinny boy jumping as he looks up. “Stop it Zack.” He grumps as he pulls on his sweatshirt. “Nahh. So how’s life, Jack Skellington?” He asks, leaning against the lockers. “Pretty okay until you showed up.” Ryan shuts his locker, leaning against them as he waits for the guys to come back over. “Awe you can’t hate me that much Ross.” Zack pouts.  
“Oh trust me. I do.” He says. “No he doesn’t, Ryan play nice.” Spencer scolds as he shoves Ryan gently to open his locker.  
Brendon steadies Ryan gently, his hand on Ryans hip as he looks at him with concern, Ryan went down easily. “I’m fine.” Ryan assures him a bit quickly, standing up to straight. Brendons fingers linger for a few seconds before his arm drops.  
Ryans heart races a bit as he watches Jac and some of her friends, just embarrassment..right? God please let it be embarrassment.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan is struggling. Still.

Ryan walks down to Spencer's, his hands hidden in his pockets. He had gotten shoved against the wall while being yelled at, being told how he should already have scholarships lined up, not mentioning the fact that he did, just not what his dad wanted. He was going to college for English Lit, he was going to be a writer, maybe like famous people leech off him for lyrics.  
He walks around the house to the backyard, stepping through the gate quietly. Of course there was Mrs. Smith, working in her garden. "Hello Ryan, what are you doing here?" She smiles at him, her words friendly as always. "Me and Spence were gonna study since Jon apparently won't help us anymore." He explains easily, he loved talking to the woman, she was so sweet to him. Spencer walks out at an almost perfect time. "Here." He hands his mom a glass of lemonade. They were such a perfect family, always with freshly made orange juice in the morning, one of those perfect two story Victorian's with a big wrap around porch.  
The family cat was lounging on the porch, Ryan immediately scooping her up as he heads inside. She mews but purrs loudly at him, letting him hold her. She was a total sweetheart, Ryan immediately bonded with her the first time he came over, for dinner with his dad when he was about 5. She had been a kitten at the time, happy to jump around to follow the cat toy he was wiggling. It was quite amazing, completely distracted by the cat and Spencer showing him all his cool toys.  
Ryan accepts the tea he's offered, following Spencer upstairs and gently dumping Miss Tots onto the bed. Yes, Miss Tots. Ryan and Spencer had a say in her name. Ryan sits at the edge of the bed, his back pressing against the wall as his legs stretch out. He sips the lemonade, sighing happily. Mrs. Smith made amazing lemonade, brown sugar instead of that fake crap most places use.  
Spencer lays down next to Ryan, his feet propped up on his pillow as his head rests in Ryans lap. "What happened?" He finally asks. "The usual, Dad calls me a pansy for wanting to write, I say something back, next thing you know we're yelling at each other." Ryan shrugs and sips more of the lemonade, one hand running through Spencer's hair absentmindedly. "So he still refuses to accept you have thoughts other than his?" "Basically yes." Ryan sets the cup aside gently, looking down at Spencer. "How's Haley?" He asks, not having seen her in a while. "Oh she had to go with her family for a trip thing, her dad's job gave it to him for working so hard. She's currently in London." He smiles a bit wistfully. "You'll get to go to London with your girlfriend one day, Smith. Don't look so sad." Ryan teases, earning a gentle jab to his ribs.  
He continues to mess with Spencers hair, his eyes closing as he leans his head against the wall. He relaxes as Spencers breathing begins to soften, falling asleep with the boy.  
Sometime during the night Spencer must have moved them, when Ryan wakes up he's covered with Spencers comforter and Spencer is no where to be found. The clock flashes four fifty two am. That's enough time to go get his shit and get to school. He gets up slowly, walking downstairs. Spencer was half asleep watching tv, his legs hanging off the couch as he does. "I'm gonna head home. I'll see you later." Ryan whispers, smiling at the soft touch to the inside of his wrist.  
He walks home slowly, dreading the cleanup. He grabs a trash bag, scooping empty bottles into it and dumping out the rest. Well he finishes one right there but otherwise they're dumped out.  
He ties the bag and sets it out back. walking back inside to shower off and get dressed. His hair falls in his face stupidly from being wet. He grabs his backpack and his set of keys, walking down the street. Spencer pulls up as usual and he gets in. "Am I picking up Jac again?" Spencer asks, the radio softly playing Blink-182. "Nah you're good. Her friends are getting her today." Ryan leans back in the seat as the first drops of rain hit the windshield.  
Spencer pulls up to a slightly unfamiliar house, it was perfect..wow. Painted robin egg blue with a red-brown door. The front garden was full of nice flowers and herbs, a dog barks from the front porch, refusing to come out in the rain. Brendon appears at the screen, talking to a woman who looked like him before hugging her and running out with his backpack. He gets in the backseat, all sunshine and rainbows as usual. "Hey guys!" He smiles at the boys. Ryan smiles back a bit, not able to resist the cheerfulness radiating from him.  
Spencer laughs at Brendon who was now bobbing his head to the radio, his glasses sliding down his nose. Ryan watches Brendon with a small grin before turning back to the front, turning it up a bit for him. He curls one leg to his chest, watching out the window. The rain was getting surprisingly heavy for the desert, blocking most of the view.  
They finally pull up, Spencer taking one of the umbrellas to run inside. "That shit." Ryan huffs as he gets the other one. Brendon was waiting for him, obviously. Ryan clicks the umbrella open as he gets out, holding it over the door a bit as Brendon steps out. Their shoulders press together as they rush inside, Ryan holding the umbrella of course.  
Brendons hand touches the small of his back before it moves to his hip, pulling him closer all the sudden. Ryan almost fights away until he realizes Brendon was saving him from getting drenched in mud. He smiles gratefully at the boy, his skin electrified where Brendon was still touching it gently. His shirt had ridden up as usual, his feminine hips obvious. Both of them were pretty feminine looking in the hip department, and the ass department for Brendon. Brendons eyes trail down Ryans face, settling on his lips, before his hand drops and they walk the rest of the way in an intense silence. Ryan shakes out the umbrella, putting it into the grocery back Brendon offers before he walks inside with him. Ryan hightails to his locker with one last look at Brendon, stuffing the umbrella away.  
Jacs hand touches his cheek before he's gently tugged in for a kiss, the girl holding his cheek gently. He kisses back quickly, trying to ignore the nagging voice telling him to pull away, look for Brendon. His hands hold her hips, smiling as she leans closer into the kiss. Finally they pull away, her forehead resting on his as always. He absolutely adored her, why did he keep thinking about Brendon? How Brendon would look all kiss drunk and those lips swollen and red from making out, His brown eyes half lidded and- no! God, Ryan, stop thinking about this shit! He kisses Jac again gently to avert his thoughts, feeling her happily kiss back and her lips part slowly.  
The two reluctantly pull away, Ryan pecking her cheek before Jac heads off to her locker. Ryans thoughts turn back to Brendon, his head bowed as he thinks about the boy. He looks up when he hears Brendon, watching him talk animatedly to a boy. His eyes dart to Ryans for a few seconds before Ryan ducks his head, trying to act as if he hadn't been staring. He shuts his locker quickly and walks off. No more of this, he's gotta stop it. One way, just stay with Jac and stop talking to Brendon. But the second way, its a very daydream material plan. Leave Jac and get with Brendon. No, he can't hurt her like that. He just can't.  
The brown eyes currently boring into his back say otherwise.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Warning - there's some sexual stuff, not full on sex or anything but a certain someone does get very horny.  
> Otherwise it's just a cute chapter.

Brendons hands hold Ryans hips gently, kissing and licking each sound from Ryan. Ryan presses himself closer as he lets out a quiet moan, eyes closing as Brendons hands run down slowly. He’s picked up gently and Brendon pins him to the wall.  
Ryans back arches as he grips Brendons hair, those lips on his neck, sucking dark marks like a little galaxy on him. “Ryan..Ryan?” That was definetly Brendon, sounding confused and a bit worried.  
A soft gasp follows Ryan as he wakes up, quickly sitting up. Brendon was right there, his hand on Ryans shoulder. “You were uhh..moving a lot. I was worried.” The boy explains softly, his dark eyes focused on the older. “I’m fine.” Ryan immediately says, bunching his blankets onto his crotch. Brendons eyes lower as he notices the awkward attempt to hide his boner. Ryan flushes as he looks away from Brendon.   
Brendon touches Ryans thigh for a few seconds before he goes back to his mattress, closing his eyes as he relaxes. Ryan closes his eyes, uncomfortably curling up. He couldn’t just jack off with literally all his friends there. He’d have to wait until his shower in the morning.  
He lays there silently, just staring up at the ceiling. His thighs pressed together as he tries to fall back asleep. He seriously had a sex dream about Brendon fucking Urie. And he was the bottom! He’d never be a bottom.

Hours later he finally gets relief in a very cold shower, dressing quickly and walking to the living room. Mrs. Smith had already made breakfast, setting it out for all the boys. Brendon was talking to her as he happily ate, Ryan settles down to eat as well, his head down as he eats.  
He goes for the eggs first, his ankles locking as he does. He takes a sip of the orange juice as he keeps his eyes away from Brendon. He finishes quickly, helping Mrs. Smith with the dishes since everyone else had been desperately eating.  
He stands with her quietly, smiling a bit at that familiar scent. She smelled like warmth and comfort, that amazing laundry detergent she’d make. She was homey. He leans his head against her shoulder for a few seconds, he wished she was his mother.  
He relaxes as she kisses his temple, drying her hands off as they finish the dishes. She hands him the towel and he smiles a bit,drying his hands as he walks back to the living room. He goes to get his stuff together, helping Brendon fold some blankets quietly. They work quickly to clean up while the others hang out in the backyard and play with the dogs.  
Ryan sets some blankets up on a shelf, standing on his toes to get it up. Brendons quiet breath fans over his neck as his chest presses to Ryans back. Ryan stumbles forward a bit, his chin hitting his shelf. Brendon sets some blankets on the shelf, fingers running under Ryans chin and tilting his head. “Are you okay?” He asks softly, his eyes concerned. “I..I’m fine.” Ryan breathes out, his eyes a bit wide as they trail to Brendons lips.   
Brendon touches the little red spot on his chin worriedly, backing off when the bathroom door opens. Ryan lets out a relieved breath, speeding to his backpack. “Bye Mrs. Smith!” He calls and runs out, his entire body flushed and warm from embarrassment.  
He rushes to his workplace, locking his backpack away. He puts on his apron, quietly beginning to make the tuna salad they always served. People liked it better than the old cooks, mostly because Ryan actually uses the ingredients properly. His eyes focus on cooking, Audrey playing some demos she liked from her iPod.   
He looks at the currently pink haired girl with a slight smile. She was sweet to him, she’d take customers when his dad would call or if he was getting too snappish from the lack of sleep. She was slicing meat at the moment. He keeps an eye on her, waiting until she stopped to speak. “Turn the level down Audrey. The way you’re moving your hand, you’ll end up with no fingers.” He says softly.   
“You got it Ryface.” She nods, actually listening to him. He continues to make the salad, setting the bowl into the display. He cleans up the extra ingredients, humming to the music on Audrey’s phone. They usually worked with Fall Out Boy playing, she really liked Andy. Personally Ryan really loved Pete. He was awesome. So was Patrick though. As if on cue she turns on Homesick At Space Camp.  
The girl bounces a bit, now setting out the still wrapped meats. She mouths along to it at Ryan who starts laughing, his head tipping back as he does. He starts mouthing it back, bouncing as he does, pretending to be playing guitar. They mess around since no one was really here at the moment, finally finishing the album.   
She puts away her iPod on a charger in the back, taking deli orders and handing the sheets to Ryan as he carries them out. They get to leave earlier than normal since the deli was closing at four instead of seven. It would open back up at twelve but their boss understood that they were in school still so he didn’t ask them to take those shifts.  
Audrey grabs Ryans hand, dragging him out once he got his backpack. They walk down the street, sharing her earbuds as they walk. He still had his backpack of clothes with him so they went to her warehouse, or at least she said it was hers. Her older brother had a band so they used it for practice space but they were on hiatus because of some fights. Audrey used it to bring all their friends over for a party, best part about her is she rarely invited Brendon.   
Usually it was him, Audrey, Brent and kids from other schools that were all into the same things they were. She plugs her iPod in, blasting Switchblades and Infidelity. They lay on the floor as the listen to it, her legs over his and his arm over her stomach gently.  
He was glad to have her around. Jac was great but she was a bit sex crazed since they were in a relationship.Audrey just liked to hang out and occasionally put even more makeup on him. He’d let her every time, he didn’t mind she was friends with Brendon despite his current struggle. She sometimes made them sit next to each other so her and her friends could turn them into scene queens. Brendon would do this stupid valley girl accent whenever they’d dress him up.  
It was absolutely hilarious.   
Audrey looks up at him. “Wanna smoke? My brother left me some.” She offers. “Yes oh my god.” He sits up immediately. She laughs and gets up, walking to get the stash. She breaks up the weed quietly, rolling a joint in her custom made bright pink rolling paper with polka dots. It was ridiculous.  
He pulls out his lighter and she holds the end of the joint in the flame, taking a deep drag. She passes it to him as she coughs softly, her fist covering her mouth. He runs his fingers through her hair as he takes a drag, closing his eyes as he does. He coughs immediately, holding the joint away from their faces until she takes it from him.  
They sit there for a while, coughing and passing it to each other. It’s been awhile since they’ve gotten to relax. This was amazing. “I think I’m gonna dye my hair blonde.” Audrey says as she stretches her legs out. “Why?” He looks down at her. “Well Jac is looking quite good in the color and I’d love to try it.” She shrugs. He shrugs. “I like your pink. Though you could definitely rock blonde.” He decides as he runs his fingers through her hair still.  
She smiles at him, putting the roach into the ashtray. They sit there for a little while longer, enjoying the music and each others company.  
Everything felt truly balanced, for now at least.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan goes to a party.  
> There's smooches and finally he's mostly awake. Woohoo!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was super fun to write tbh, I enjoyed writing a drunk scene.  
> Now I understand it seems rushed but I had a friend tell me about the way alcohol affects him, and he said vodka makes everything faster so the punch is spiked with vodka.  
> Early 2000's parties are always fun.

Ryan sits at the counter, watching the few people in the deli-shop. Jac was supposed to come about fifteen minutes before his shift ended, so they could head out to a party one of her friends was hosting. He taps along to the song Spencer was playing on his iPod, Audrey’s had died earlier so Spencer volunteered his.  
He was, as usual, playing Blink-182. The two boys always listened to Blink together, all the damn time.”Do you listen to literally anything else besides Blink?” Audrey asks, putting bargain deal stickers on the deli subs they had wrapped. “Never.” Spencer shakes his head, tapping his fingers to the drums.  
Ryan looks up as the bell rings, his world stopping for a few seconds as Brendon walks in, his throat closing up and his heart beginning to race. He had avoided the boy like the plague for the past week, oh god. He quickly rushes to the back, pretending to check for something as Spencer takes Brendon order. Holy shit that’s a huge order. “Ryan come out here! We need your help.” Audrey says.  
Ryan slowly walks out, immediately taking up the meat slicer for Audrey. He keeps his eyes on the slicer, feeling Brendons eyes on him as he does. He finally looks up once he was done, gulping a bit before he turns the machine off. Spencer was making the sandwiches quickly as Audrey dished the ridiculous amount of egg salad and coleslaw Brendon got. “Good lord, are you feeding the US army?” She asks.  
“Just the family.” He smiles at her easily, taking out his wallet. Ryan cringes as the two make him deal with the register, hiding behind his hair that Audrey had decided needed to have red streaks in it. “I like the hair.” Brendon says, as if knowing Ryan was anxious about it. “Oh.. thanks.” He mumbles as he rings everything up, flashing the total on the screen. “32.69.” He says quietly.  
Brendon hands him two $20’s and Ryan opens the register, handing him his change quickly then the carefully packaged bags of food. “Enjoy the food.” Ryan says politely, his eyes meeting Brendon’s before he looks away. “Have a nice day Ryan.” Brendon smiles at him before walking off.  
“Oh my god the tension.” Audrey’s voice breaks into his thoughts about Brendons lips forming his name. He looks at her quickly. “What tension? What are you talking about?” His voice raises in pitch from fear, eyes widening. She pats his shoulder gently. “You should’ve told me. I won’t tell.” She reassures him. “Tell what?” He asks defensively. “Ryan. That wasn’t any straight guy anxiety.” She says softly.  
His shoulders slump as he looks down at the floor. “I feel like shit for it. I don’t want to do this to Jac. She deserves more.” He confides in his friend. “You have to break it off with her before she catches on, that could cause horrible rumours, especially from her.” Audrey says softly, rubbing his shoulder as he leans his head on hers. “I know.. I just feel bad for doing this to her, ya know?” He looks at her.  
“Yes I do. But you can’t keep leading her on, the more hurt she is, the worse anything she’ll do will be.” Audrey was the voice of reason for once, her hair falling over his shoulder. “Okay.. should I do it tonight?” He looks at her. “Whenever you think is the safest.” She says a bit unhelpfully. He sighs and nods, leaning his head back.   
“What if I break up with her, just for Brendon to not like me back?” He asks. “Bren’s gay, you know that right?” She raises an eyebrow at him as she tells him. “He is?” Ryan asks, eyes widening a bit as he looks at her. “Uhh. Yeah. He’s still not out to his church but his parents know, they’re surprisingly accepting.” She says. “That explains.. A lot.” Ryan mumbles, sinking into her. “What do you mean?”  
“Well, first it was raining really hard about a week ago right? There was only one umbrella so we shared it and he pulled me away from some car trying to splash us with mud and he held for a pretty long time..and then at Spencer’s house I was helping put away blankets and he got realllyyy close.” Ryan admits shyly as Audrey grins at him.  
“Shut up.” He frowns at her as she giggles at him. “Anything else?” She asks, raising an eyebrow. He bites his lip. “I had a sex dream about him.. Like not full on sex, we didn’t get to that. But it was..nice.” He says, not meeting her eyes. “Oh my god Ryan! Like...sex or ya know, the weird stuff you found on the internet?” She asks.  
“It was just grinding and making out. Nothing good happened because he seriously woke me up. I was making noises and faces apparently.” He pouts a bit at the memory of the other day. “You whore.” She grins and ruffles his hair.  
The bell rings as Jac walks in, smiling at Ryan as she walks up. Spencer had already made her usual, Jacs face darkening when she sees how close Audrey and Ryan were. Audrey lets go of Ryan and waltzes off to the back. Ryan walks around the counter to kiss Jac, feeling her possessive, jealous hold on the back of his neck.  
He lets her tug the ends of his hair as she kisses him, pulling away once she was satisfied with the kiss she got. He walks back around the counter, searching for Audrey. He sighs in disappointment as he realizes she had already left, she was supposedly going to the strip tonight with their friends.  
Ryan wanted to go so bad but he had already promised Jac he’d go with her, he hated those stupid parties. They were just spiked fruit punch and that one asshole that brought cocaine. One girl almost died last party. It was terrifying.  
He walks out after changing out of his deli smelling clothes, heading over to Jac who was paying for her food. He kisses her cheek gently and she gently grabs his hand, leading him outside to her car. “We’ll stop by your house so you can put your backpack inside then we’ll go.” She says as she gets into the front seat. He smiles as he sits in the passenger seat quickly.   
She speeds off to his neighborhood, fiddling with the radio until she finds some good music. The one thing her and Audrey agreed on, music.   
She pulls into his driveway and he runs inside, applying some eyeliner before he runs back out. She smiles at the eyeliner as she begins to drive to the party. He counts the bus stations, there was one maybe 5 minutes from the party. Looks like the breakup would be happening at the party. His foot shakes in anxiety, sighing softly as he leans his head back.   
She parks the car, dragging him for a heated kiss, her hand holding his hair. He gently touches her side as he kisses back, leaning over the gearshift as he does. He slowly pulls away, smiling at her a bit. His lips felt swollen from that, she liked doing that. It made her more popular apparently, to be all whored out.  
The two walk inside, Jac accepting some fruit punch as she searches for her friends. Ryan sticks near her as usual, losing her after a while. He stands in the kitchen eating some cold spaghetti. He knew the friend and the girls eating habits, no use to waste perfectly good food. “Making yourself comfortable?” A familiar voice teases as Ryan jumps, looking at Brendon quickly. Brendon had a fruit punch in one hand, the other resting on the counter. “Oh uh.. Yeah I guess.” He laughs uncomfortably as he puts it away.   
“You need to loosen up Ryan oh my lord.” Brendon puts a cup to Ryans lips. “Drink.” He says, Ryan almost immediately obeying. He had no clue why he listened to Brendon ever, he had no reason to. He sputters a bit at the taste of the vodka mixed in with the sweet fruit punch. He finishes the cup as he coughs, gagging a bit.   
“That’s disgusting.” He grumbles, looking up at Brendon. Brendon laughs and shrugs. “But it’ll loosen anyone up.” He pokes Ryans cheek gently as Ryan looks up at him for a few seconds. They stand close to each other, Brendon letting Ryan sip off his drink despite how disgusting it was.  
Ryan sways a bit as he stands, his head leaning against Brendons shoulder by now. He lets out a soft giggle as he turns his body, pressing his face into Brendon. “You’re officially drunk. Time to get you to a bedroom.” Brendon wraps an arm around Ryan to lead him to the stairs.  
Ryan stumbles along the entire time, almost falling straight back down the stairs. Brendon finally picks the drunk boy up and walks to a bedroom. He opens the door to the first room, freezing as he sees Jac making out with someone else. Ryans jaw drops as he just stares, he doesn’t process it fully, tilting his head. “Jac?” He whispers, tilting his head. “Jac?” He whispers. “I’ll drive him home.” Brendon says a bit quickly, closing the door.   
“Ryan I am so sorry, I shouldn’t have-” Brendon starts and Ryan cuts off the second person of the night. This time with his lips pressed against Brendons. “Please. Shut up.” Ryan mumbles, letting his legs drop to the ground. He shrugs a bit, looking at Brendon whose eyes were wide and his fingers pressed to his mouth.  
“I’ll take the bus tonight.” Ryan says wisely, well as wise as a sixteen year old who can’t hold two drinks without getting wasted can be. He stumbles downstairs as he begins walking to the station. He sits down quietly as he watches for the bus, head leaning back. The lights blur as he begins to fall asleep, slumping over onto his side.  
The feeling of a breeze washes over him, the sound of wind in a fast car alongside it. Lights pass overhead and comforting, the smell of a very boyish scent mixed with hot cocoa and just something homey filling his nose as warm arms carry him.  
He’s laid down in his bed, mumbling a bit as he curls up under the comforter, passing out with one last glimpse of dark brown eyes and a kiss to the forehead.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan is conflicted.  
> Happy birthday Ryan!

Ryan sighs as he stares out the window. Jac had cheated on him..he’d cheated on her. Thank god it was Saturday. He didn’t have to deal with anyone but Audrey today. She’d understand he needed rest. Hopefully.  
He glares at his alarm as it begins blaring, revealing the headache he had. He unplugs it with annoyance, slowly standing and walking to the bathroom. He cups his hands under the sink faucet and drinks the water from his hands quickly.  
He just shuffles around for a while, his eyes adjusting to the natural light as he begins to get dressed for work. He shuffles downstairs, looking at dad, he was making toast? “Morning.” Ryan says, his voice low and a bit rough. He walks over to the coffee pot, almost immediately being handed a cup.  
“Thanks dad. How was your night?” He asks, trying to be nice to the man. He was still his father. Ryan sips the coffee quietly, watching him quietly. “I went on a date finally.” He looks at Ryan, judging his reaction. Ryan gulps a bit, his lips pressing together. “How was it?” He finally asks. “It was good. She was nice.” He supplies, nodding a bit. “Ryan if this goes well, this won’t replace your mother. But we need a woman in the house.” He says softly.  
“Does she know you drink yourself to sleep? Does she know about me? Does she know you can’t buy groceries for yourself and your kid?” Ryan fires back at him, putting the cup down and walking out. He goes back upstairs and locks the door, his body shaking in anger. He just wanted mom to come home.  
He gets dressed quickly, hiding in the big jacket as he shoulders his backpack. He was just gonna go stay at Audrey’s or something, he had to get away for the weekend. He walks back downstairs and heads to the front door. Dad was sitting at the table, head in his hands. “I’ll be back Sunday night or Monday afternoon.” Ryan says plainly, walking out.  
He walks to the deli, seeing Brendon with his picture perfect family. Two little kids were playing with the dog while Brendon’s mom(?) watered some plants, his father reading a newspaper on the front porch.  
Only Brendon noticed the boy walking past, smiling as he stands up. “Ryan!” He calls, jogging over to Ryan. Ryan backs up a bit, his jacket covering as much of him as he could. “Hey Brendon..” He forces a smile. “Would you like to join us for breakfast? We’re about to eat.” Brendon offers, Ryan’s stomach grumbling in response. “No..I really shouldn’t impose on your family.” Ryan tries to smile again, more of a grimace on his face.  
“We insist.” Brendon’s mom walks over with a sweet smile. Oh god. “Okay..” Ryan reluctantly agrees, Brendon’s face lighting up as he grabs Ryans wrist gently. “Come on in! You can put your backpack in my room.” He half drags him inside, Ryan almost tripping on the stairs.  
It was a fucking cookie cutter house, everything was so nice and homey here. He lets Brendon drag him along as he takes in as much of the house as he could.  
Brendon opens a door to his room, Ryan immediately feeling a bit more comfortable in the mess of clothes and band posters. He slowly walks in, looking around quietly. “Where were you headed?” Brendon asks curiously. “I was gonna hang around the deli, maybe work some extra hours with Audrey. I’m probably staying with her this weekend, Dad’s pretty pissed at me for-” He cuts himself off, pressing his lips together.  
Brendon raises an eyebrow but doesn’t press anymore, nodding a bit. “Put your backpack right here..are you going to wear that jacket during breakfast?” He asks, looking at Ryans jacket a bit judgmentally. “I guess not..” Ryan slowly unzips it, feeling bare as he slides it off. He was wearing a t-shirt for once, revealing the little scribbles and doodles on his arms from Audrey and him getting bored.  
“Wow. Those are cool.” Brendon says as he points at Ryan’s arm. If only he knew why the two drew them on. “Thanks.” Ryan nods a bit, pushing his hair back self-consciously. Brendon moves a bit closer, his chest almost touching Ryans as they just stare at each other. Brendon’s tongue runs along his lower lip as Ryan gulps a bit, lips parting a bit.  
Brendon leans closer, pressing a gentle kiss beside Ryan’s mouth. An involuntary disappointed noise escapes Ryan, feeling the smile curve onto Brendon’s face as he kisses Ryan slowly. Ryan kisses back immediately, his hand gently pressing to Brendon’s stomach as Brendon’s arm locks around Ryan’s waist gently. The two stay like that until air was a necessity, Ryan’s forehead pressed against Brendon’s.  
Ryan closes his eyes, not able to look Brendon in the eye. He was cheating on his girlfriend for this..it was so good though. He presses another kiss to Brendon’s lips, his hand holding onto Brendon’s shirt as he does. A soft sound escapes Brendon as Ryan tugs him even closer.  
They pull away much slower than earlier, Brendon’s hand cupping Ryan’s cheek gently. They half jump away when Brendon’s mom calls up the stairs for them. Ryan wipes his mouth a bit desperately, his face flushing as he look away.  
“It’s fine. My parents know I’m gay.” Brendon says. “Well I’m not! And no one knows! If my dad finds out he’ll kill me!” Ryan snaps quietly, his eyes wide with fear. “Ryan relax. I’ll make sure no one finds out, okay?” Brendon says softly, smoothing Ryans shirt gently. Ryan jerks away, his breath shaking a bit.  
“Let’s just go eat. I need to go to work soon.” He says quietly, walking out quickly. Brendon leads him out, his hand holding onto Ryans gently. Ryan allows him this until they get downstairs, tugging his hand away quickly.  
They sit at the dinner table, Ryan watching as Mrs. Urie plates the food and sets it out. It was sparing but looked much better than bland toast with butter that may be expired. Ryan waits until the adults and Brendon begin to eat, still ingrained with the habit of eating after parents. Dad and Mom would make him do it, stupid rules of the household. Stupid fucking rules.  
Ryan stays dead silent as they eat, his head down and his jaw clenched a bit. Brendons hand gently touches his knee, rubbing it gently.  
Ryan relaxes a bit, looking over at the boy. Brendon smiles at him, squeezing the older boys knee lightly.  
Ryan’s face drops a bit in relief as breakfast ends, allowing Brendon to lead him upstairs after Brendon promises his mom that he’ll do the dishes later. Ryan pulls his jacket back on, feeling better being hidden under the cloth. His eyes close as he presses his nose into the fabric. “Ry?” Brendon asks, Ryan’s eyes darting up. Brendon gently pulls Ryan to his chest, his nose pressing against Ryan’s cheek. Ryan gently runs his fingers up Brendon’s spine slowly, feeling it through the thin shirt easily.They stand like that, Ryan’s eyes closed as he trails his fingers up and down the boys spine. Brendon presses a slow kiss to Ryan’s jaw, slowly moving up to his lips.  
Ryan’s hand hold his hips gently as Brendon wraps his arms around Ryan’s neck, tangling his fingers through Ryan’s soft hair. Brendon walks them backward onto his bed, tripping and going down just like a rom-com scene. Ryan laughs a bit against his lips, looking up at him. “That was so cheesy.” He laughs at Brendon who was slowly turning red. “Shut it Ross.” He grumbles. “Oooh bad man, gonna shut me up?” Ryan jokes, eyes widening as Brendon flips them around, straddling Ryan’s hip easily.  
“Oh..” Ryan breathes out, biting his lip as he looks up at Brendon. Soft kisses trail up his neck this time, this was so much better than Jac. Oh shit, Jac. Ryan squirms underneath Brendon, about to push him off when he sucks on his neck slowly. Ryan lets out a soft moan, completely relaxing as Brendon does. Brendon continues until there was a sizeable hickey, allowing Ryan to get up. “I..uh..” Ryan mumbles. “You have to go to work, I know.” Brendon pats his head. “Go on.” He shrugs.  
Ryan stands quickly, grabbing his backpack. He felt like he should kiss Brendon, a little goodbye peck. Brendon was already shuffling away to get something. “Bye then.” Ryan mumbles and rushes out, flashing a smile to the Urie’s as he flees what could basically be considered a crime scene for him.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some stuff happens. That's all I gotta say. And they are kinda drunk so the night feels rushed.

Ryan curls his legs up to his chest, half listening to Audrey talk as she gets dressed. They were all going out to the strip as a celebration/grievance that Ryan had finally broken up with Jac. “Ryan, where are you?” She asks, tilting his head up. “I’m just..” Ryan shrugs as he looks at her, sighing quietly. “I just wanna get going.” He stands up, brushing his hair out of his eyes. “You look like shit Ryface.” She tugs him to her vanity, sitting him down.  
She picks up an eyeliner pencil as he tilts his head back a bit for her, eyes trained on the ceiling as she lines them. She pats his cheek five minutes later. “There. You look almost like yourself again.” She ruffles his carefully straightened hair. “Quit that.” He huffs at her, fixing his hair as he stands back up. She grins and pulls on her jacket, pushing her long hair out of her eyes. “Okay ready.” She grabs his hands.  
A car honks outside as Audrey raids her dads alcohol cabinet, Ryan standing guard just in case. The two run outside, Audrey getting in the front seat as Ryan slides into the back, half landing on Gabe's lap when his hip is grabbed. Gabe holds Ryan there causing the smaller boy to pout a bit, moving so his back was pressed against the door. “Why are you like this.” Ryan says in a deadpan.  
“You’re just so soft and cuddly Ryan..like a bitchy body pillow.” Gabe lays his head on Ryans shoulder as one of Audrey’s friends drives the car.. Or maybe it was her current boyfriend. The car pulls up to the uncomfortably perfect house of Ryan’s nightmares, the equally perfect boy running out. “Nooo.” Ryan groans.  
Brendon slides into the backseat, blinking in confusion as he looks at Ryan, still sat in Gabe’s lap and fingers tangled in Gabe’s hair. Gabe smiles at Brendon, finally releasing Ryan and shoving him at Brendon. “Will everyone stop throwing me?” Ryan protests as he lands on top of Brendon this time.  
“Just cause I’m small doesn’t mean you can bully me.” Ryan sticks his tongue out at Gabe, earning a laugh and poke to the stomach. Ryan settles between Brendon and Gabe, feeling the warmth from both of them. Fuck this wasn’t fun.  
He sighs in relief when they finally park in some shady parking lot, climbing over Gabe to get out first. Audrey opens the half empty bottle of vodka and takes a quick swig. Brendon opens the bottle of whiskey, passing it to Ryan after taking a drink. The group sets off to meet up with Vicky and everyone else, Ryan and Brendon staying next to each other as they share a bottle.  
Brendons hand settles on Ryans hip, Ryan’s hand holding a belt loop as they walk quietly.   
Ryans head lean against Brendons shoulder, looking at all the lights quietly. Brendon kisses the crown of his head, wrapping his arm fully around Ryan. Ryan takes the bottle, downing half of what was left, his body pressed to Brendon. Audrey looks back at them, understanding and betrayal flashing on her face before she speeds up to open the warehouse door.  
They all walk in, mostly splitting up to find more alcohol. Ryan heads to the bar after Audrey. “Audrey?” He asks, worried about the girl who seemed stiff now. “What, Ryan?” She asks, frowning at him. “What’s wrong?” He asks, gently touching her arm. “Why didn’t you tell me it was Brendon?” She asks, frowning still. His heart drops. “What are you talking about?” He lies, frowning at her as he does.  
“It’s him! He’s the one who left the hickey, he’s the one replacing Jac!” She says, her voice rising as she stares at Ryan. “I.. I don’t know, okay? He’s just..he’s there? And he’s been there..” He says, biting his lip. This made no sense to either of them. “I really like him..” Ryan admits finally, looking at the girl. She stares at him, sighing slowly as she pulls him over.  
He leans into her touch, accepting the drink she hands to him. “Go get him then. At least fuck him, he’s physically perfect.” She says, throwing her head back as she takes a shot. He blushes, finishing off the drink she handed him earlier. He sets the glass down and she pats his hand encouragingly before he walks off to find Brendon.  
He looks around with a soft sigh, eyes finally landing on the brown eyed boy. He was smiling and dancing with some guy, hips moving against the guys. Ryans jaw clenches before he moves through the crowd, finding Gabe easily. “Finally.” Gabe smiles as he pulls Ryan over by his hips.   
Ryans head leans back as Gabe grinds on him, one hand threaded in Gabes hair as Gabes hands possessively hold his hips. Ryans head turns as Gabe kisses up his neck, Brendons eyes flick over to Ryan, Ryan letting out a low moan as his eyes begin to close. Brendon glares as Ryan pushes up against Gabes hand, feeling it squeeze as he almost whines, mouth dropping open. Gabe didn't want to settle down yet, just fuck and make other guys jealous.   
Ryan presses his nose against Gabe’s neck, whimpering quite audibly as Gabe squeezes. He looks up again, Brendons eyes were still on him. Ryan carefully disentangles himself from Gabe who presses a messy kiss to his cheek and disappears, something he took had most definitely kicked in. Ryan stumbles to the bar, his neck sensitive as he hides in the shadows with someones old drink.   
He closes his eyes slowly as he stands there, trying to ignore the noise around him. A warmth touches his side and he turns his head, stiffening slightly a hand runs along his hip gently. Brendon. He leans into the touch, looking at Brendon quietly. “Trying to make me jealous, Ross? “ He raises an eyebrow. “Definitely. “ Ryan smiles and presses his lips to Brendons slowly.  
Brendon holds his hip as he kisses back slowly, his other hand cupping Ryans cheek. They move closer, Ryan setting the cup down as Brendon pulls him back towards a wall, his hands wandering down Ryans sides. Slowly they pull back, Brendons forehead pressed against Ryans shoulder. Ryan runs his fingers along Brendons spine slowly, his eyes on the people on the dance floor.   
Audrey looks at the two, smiling at Ryan as Brendon kisses along his shoulder to his exposed neck. Ryan smiles faintly back, his head leaning back as Brendon nibbles along his neck, humming quietly as his teeth graze Ryans soft spot. Ryan bucks against him with a soft groan, pulling Brendon closer. “Bren..” He moans softly, his hands gripping Brendons shirt.   
Brendon’s hand run down and grip Ryans thighs, lifting him up. Ryan wraps his legs around Brendon’s waist, head leaning back as he bucks up against Brendon desperately, groaning softly as he gently tugs Brendon’s hair.  
Brendon slowly walks to a different room, closing a door behind them. “How..how do you know your way so well?” Ryan’s voice pitches as Brendon squeezes his ass. “I come here a lot Ry.” Brendon sets Ryan down on the couch, laid down between his legs as he kisses down to Ryans exposed collarbone. Ryan moans softly as he grips the couch, completely compliant as Brendon helps him out of his jacket.   
Brendon trails kisses from his wrist up to his shoulder slowly, savoring Ryan’s little gasps and whimpers. Ryan’s hips lift. “Brendon please!” He begs as his hips rock up against Brendon, he whimpers softly as he squirms. Brendon gently tugs Ryan’s shirt off, Ryan’s hands quickly reach up, unbuttoning Brendon’s shirt. He sits up, biting gently down along Brendon’s chest. Brendon’s moan echoes through the room as Ryan kisses and sucks along to his neck, grinding up against Brendon.   
Brendon half shoves him down onto the couch, unbuttoning Ryan’s jeans and tugging them down quickly. He palms Ryan through his boxers, smirking as he listens to Ryan’s little desperate whimpers and moans. “Brendon!” His voice pitches. “Quiet.” Brendon whispers as he flips Ryan onto his stomach, cold air hitting the back of Ryan’s thighs.


	7. Chapter 7

“You look don't look healthy kiddo.” George says as he looks at Ryan with concern. Ryan was even paler than usual, his eyes half closed as he leans over his coffee. “‘m probably not. “ Ryan mumbles, looking up tiredly. “Maybe you should stay home, get some sleep.” George says, ruffling Ryans hair.   
“You're cool with that?” Ryan rubs his eye, stifling a yawn. “Yeah. Sleep, I'll call into your school.“ George sighs and walks out to get the home phone. Ryan slowly stands up, dumping his coffee and washing the cup. He heads back upstairs, curling up under his covers. He closes his eyes as he relaxes in the warmth under the blanket.   
He slips in and out of sleep until his phone goes off suddenly, loudly ringing with Audrey’s ringtone. He groans as he reaches for it, pressing answer tiredly. “Hello?” He mumbles, his head on the pillow still. “You sound horrible, are you sick?” She asks, her phone obviously on speaker. “Yeah I am.” A yawn punctuates the sentence. “Okay I just wanted to tell you Brendon called me and said to make sure you were okay.” She giggles at the end of the sentence.  
“Oh my godd.” He groans before closing his eyes again. She laughs. “Get back to sleep Ry, I’ll tell him you’re sick.” She giggles, saying a quick love you before hanging up. He mumbles something as he passes back out, his phone dropping next to his head.

Ryan wakes up with a slow yawn, rubbing his eye as he does. He sits up as he yawns quietly, sliding out of the bed. Damn it was almost dark. He shuffles to the bathroom, grumbling quietly as his feet touch the cold tiles of the bathroom.  
A knock interrupts him as he heads to the kitchen, his head turns before he walks over. He opens the door slowly, the screen door between him and Brendon. “Oh hey.” Ryan nervously flattens his hair. “Hey..can we talk?” Brendon asks, looking nervous. “Yeah come on in.” Ryan opens the door and moves out of the way.  
Brendon walks in, his hands stuffed back into his pockets. “Do you want something to drink?” Ryan offers. “Sure.” Brendon nods a bit, following Ryan to the kitchen. “Ryan, Jac saw us last night.” He says, his voice scared. “What do you mean?” Ryan looks at him, his hands tightening into fists. “She got a picture of us..she sent it to Gabe and he sent it to me.” Brendon holds up his phone slowly.  
“Oh my god..” Ryans lower lip trembles a bit, covering his face as he sniffles softly. Brendon’s arms gently wrap around him, pulling him close as Ryan tries to calm down. Ryan’s hands grip Brendon’s shirt as he presses against the boy.  
Brendon’s hand runs up and down Ryans back as he holds onto Brendon, trembling as he does. Brendon presses a kiss to Ryan’s forehead as Ryan slowly calms down, pulling away. “I can’t believe she’d seriously do that..” Ryan mumbles as he looks down at the floor. “I’m sorry.” Brendon kisses his forehead.  
Ryan jerks away, his arms wrapped around his stomach as he tries to keep from panicking. “You have to leave.” He says quietly to Brendon. “W..what? Why? I didn’t know she’d do that. Ryan I’m sorry.” Brendon says quickly, touching Ryans cheek. “Brendon you have to leave!” Ryan grabs his arm, his hold gentle as he opens the back door. “I’ll talk to you on Tuesday. Be at Audrey’s warehouse.” He pushes the boy out and shuts the door, rushing to get something to drink and get back upstairs.  
He looks out the window, watching Brendon heading down the street. He sighs and curls up in bed. The front door opens as Ryan turns out his light, closing his eyes as he begins to fall back asleep. His body shakes a bit as he curls up, sighing sleepily.  
Footsteps walk through the room before the blanket is pulled over him, tucked around him gently. A pill bottle rattles as George sets the cold medicine on the bedside table, ruffling Ryans hair before he walks out. Ryan curls up tightly as he falls back asleep.

Ryan walks down the street quietly, rubbing his eye as he looks at Brendon’s house while passing. Brendon’s bike was gone, good he’s at Audrey’s. Ryan speeds up a bit and walks along the tracks, knocking on the warehouse door. Audrey opens it a bit, the smell of weed slipping through the crack. She opens the door fully and let’s him in.  
His eyes dart over everyone until he finds Brendon. Oh.. his throat closes up a bit as he watches Brendon laugh as a tall guy wraps his arm around his shoulders. Ryan’s hands clench into fists as he looks down at the floor, letting Audrey pull him over to her and Gabe’s spot on the loveseat.  
Gabe pulls Ryan half into his lap, arms wrapped around Ryan’s waist as he always does. His face presses into Ryan’s back as Ryan just relaxes against him. Audrey tucks her feet up to the side of her, laying her head on Ryan’s lap. Ryan runs his fingers through her hair, completely relaxed from the two. His eyes land back on Brendon who was still smiling up at the tall guy. His eyes meet Ryan’s and his face drops before Ryan looks away.  
A hand touches Ryan’s a moment later and he looks up at Brendon, his fingers threading with Ryan’s ‘Come on’ He mouths and Ryan tisentangles himself from the two on the couch. He lets Brendon lead him back outside, trying to ignore the jealousy he feels when Brendon gives the tall boy one last look.  
Brendon’s hand runs up and down Ryan’s arm gently, moving up to cup his cheek. “Ryan I’m sorry.” He says softly, running his fingers through Ryan’s hair. “It’s fine. Whatever. It’s a sign we’ve got to stop this.” Ryan says quietly. Brendon’s movements halt as he looks at Ryan. “Ry, we can keep it better hidden. Please.” He says softly, holding onto Ryan’s hand almost desperately.  
“Brendon..” Ryan looks at him with a soft sigh as he looks down at the ground again. “Brendon we just can’t.” He sighs when he feels Brendon gets closer, their chests pressing together. Brendon’s lips press against Ryan’s, his hands cupping Ryan’s cheeks gently. Ryan kisses back slowly, his hands on Brendon’s hips as he pulls him a bit closer.  
Brendon’s arms wrap around Ryan’s waist, kissing him deeper as he pins Ryan to the wall. n's hands run down to squeeze Ryan's ass, kissing his neck slowly as Ryan moans softly, leaning his head back as he pushes his hips forward.  
Brendon's hips meet Ryan's, the two desperately grinding until the door opens. Brendon backs away quickly as Ryan stays leaned against the wall, completely dazed out. Gabe grins at the two. “I was wondering where you two went. “ He leans against the wall next to the door as Brendon wraps his arm around Ryan's hips.   
Ryan lays his head on Brendon’s shoulder, sighing softly as he cuddles into Brendon, his eyes closing as he does. Gabe aww’s as he lights a cigarette, Ryan grinning a bit as he presses his face into Brendon’s chest.  
Brendon rubs Ryans back gently as he kisses his temple gently. “We’re doing this?” He asks Ryan who quietly nods. “Yeah.” Ryan looks up at Brendon who smiles and kisses him gently. Ryan holds his cheek as he kisses back slowly, eyes closing as he holds onto him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for taking over a month to update, it's been hectic and the document with this chapter got messed up so I had to rewrite it. I'll try to update a bit more often, it'll just be me and my mom for a while so no more roommate drama hopefully!  
> Thank you for being patient, I know this isn't the greatest but it's something until I'm completely back on my groove. I won't be writing the Halloween party as it is past spooky month but I will write some holiday things soon, it's gonna take a downwards turn to quite, depressing things, to say the least. Thank you for sticking around, I hope you enjoy!

Ryan sits on Brendon’s bed, curling his legs up to his chest as he watches him. Brendon was currently doing his homework at his desk, completely focused as he writes answers for his math homework. Ryan flops onto his stomach, cuddling one of Brendon’s pillows to his chest as he gets comfortable enough to take a nap while he waited.  
He was almost out when Brendon’s mom, Grace, walks in, smiling when she sees the two. “Hi Ryan, I didn’t know you were here.” She smiles at him. “Hi, Grace.” He smiles sleepily, half asleep on the bed. Brendon looks up. “What’s up mom?” He tilts his head a bit. “Just gathering laundry.” She grabs his laundry basket, walking back out.   
Brendon gets up, closing the door then looks at Ryan. “Comfy there?” He asks as he walks over, running his hand through Ryan’s hair. “Soft bed,” Ryan mumbles, cuddling into the pillow more as he yawns softly. He nuzzles the pillow as Brendon lays next to him, kissing his cheek gently as he runs his fingers up and down Ryan’s side. Ryan hums as he gets closer, pressing his body almost flush to Brendon.  
Brendon slides his fingers under Ryan’s shirt, running his fingers over his stomach slowly as he kisses Ryan’s cheek lightly. Ryan smiles as he tilts his head to catch Brendon’s lips in a chaste kiss.   
They lay together, completely cuddled up as Ryan stays bordering sleep. He runs his fingers over Brendon’s arm, finally falling asleep as Brendon pulls him closer. Brendon presses a soft kiss to his temple as he falls asleep himself.

Ryan groans softly as he wakes up, yawning softly as he tries to sit up. Brendon’s arms stop him, the boy snoring softly as he holds onto him. He gently moves his arms, slowly sliding off the bed. He shuffles to the bathroom, realizing how late it was. Shit, he should be home..oh well. He walks back to Brendon’s room, crawling back into his arms and pulling the blanket around them.   
Brendon’s arms wrap around him once again, his face pressed into Ryan’s neck. Ryan watches him with a small smile, running his fingers through Brendon’s hair slowly. “I love you.” He whispers, his nose pressed into Brendon’s hair. His eyes closed as he sighs quietly, rubbing Brendon’s back slowly.  
He holds him gently, hours passing as he does. The sun rises finally, filling the room with a soft light. Ryan looks down at Brendon who finally stirs, his head tilting up. “Hi” Brendon whispers, kissing Ryan gently. “Hi yourself” He mumbles against Brendon’s lips, running his fingers over his side gently.  
Brendon grins as he pulls back, watching Ryan a bit groggily before he sits up, back arching as he stretches. “I wonder what’s for breakfast” Brendon gets up, his feet thumping a bit as he had half vaulted off the bed to get over Ryan, quickly pulling a pair of socks on. “It’s cold in here” He pouts a bit.”Well, it is 50 degrees” Ryan stands up, pulling Brendon over by his waistband.  
He kisses him gently, smiling as Brendon wraps his arms around his waist gently. “We’re going to Audrey’s Halloween party right?” Brendon asks against his lips.”Mhm, what are you gonna be?” Ryan asks as he begins to gently kiss his jaw. “I was thinking either a vampire or a skeleton.” Brendon tilts his head.  
“You were born to be a skeleton” Ryan grins as he looks at Brendon, who rolls his eyes like he was used to the boy's ridiculousness. “I’ll do vampire then, what are you gonna be?” He asks as Ryan’s lips trail down his throat. “Dunno, probably won’t dress up” Ryan shrugs and runs his cold fingers along Brendon’s warm stomach. Brendon’s heart jumps a bit as Ryan does, goosebumps rising along his skin. “You should dress up, it’ll be fun.” He tries to convince him.  
“Maybe, we’ll see” He presses a soft kiss to Brendon’s lips then pulls away. “I have to go home and make sure everything is okay” He sighs and touches Brendon’s cheek.  
“Okay..be safe, yeah?” He tilts his head, leaning into Ryan’s soft touch. “Of course babe. See you later.” He kisses his forehead, letting his arms drop as he grabs his backpack and walks downstairs. His shoes were down there. “Morning Ryan” Grace greets him, already making breakfast. “Morning Grace, sorry I stayed without asking. We fell asleep” He grins awkwardly at the woman as he tugs on his shoes.  
“It’s okay dear, are you staying for breakfast?” She asks. “Nah, I gotta go back home, Dad’s probably worried about me.” He smiles at her. “Bye,” He walks out of the house, heading back home. His house was in a slightly nicer area than the Urie’s house, their house was nice but the area surrounding it wasn’t the safest. It worried Ryan when he thought about Brendon being alone when he was heading to school.   
Ryan sighs slowly, sneaking in the back door as usual. His eyebrows lift when he doesn't immediately trip on a trash bag, jumping when his dad clears his throat. "Oh, morning dad" He smiles at the man almost nervously. "Morning Ry, hungry?" He asks as Ryan looks at breakfast. Cheese and eggs with toast on the side. "Yeah sure," Ryan sets his back down on the floor behind his chair, slowly sitting down. George pours him some coffee, setting the mug in front of the pale boy. Ryan immediately takes a drink, his eyes closing from relief. Grace wouldn't let the boys have any coffee, religious reasons she'd always say. He accepted it but he still wanted coffee.   
George sits with him. "So, where was it you stayed?" He asks, looking at Ryan as he takes a bite of toast. "Brendon's, I fell asleep," Ryan says immediately, as if practiced, well it technically was. "Ah, call me next time yeah? I was worried about you" George says, continuing to eat as Ryan nods, resembling a bobblehead doll as he eats quickly. "Brendon wants me to go to a Halloween party, is that okay?" He asks, looking at him quietly. George nods, a small frown on his face. "Be safe, no being wild just because your friends want you to," He says causing Ryan to snort as he eats. "I won't dad," He smiles at him quietly.  
"Good. How's Jac?" He asks as Ryan continues to eat. "Good I guess, we broke up," Ryan says, shrugging a bit. "Oh, why? You two were perfect." George says softly. "Eh, we just fell out of it, she didn't wanna date me, said we'd be better off friends but its still pretty awkward." The lies easily roll from Ryan's tongue, he was used to lying about his relationships to his dad. "Okay then," George nods with a soft sigh as he finishes his food. Ryan gives up his empty plate to the man and stands up. "I'm gonna go take a shower then I gotta get to work," Ryan says and grabs his bag, walking out quickly. He heads to his bedroom, grabbing some clean clothes and plugs his phone in, shutting the bathroom door behind him.

Ryan smiles at Audrey as he walks into the deli, walking to the back quickly. "Nice of the boy to come in on time," She says sarcastically as he puts on his apron. "Oh hush Audrey," He rolls his eyes as he walks out, his phone in his pocket. "Did you hear Fall Out Boy is making a new album next year?" Audrey asks as she begins to make the macaroni salad they had, long hair pulled back into a ponytail for once. "No I didn't, maybe this time we'll make it to a concert." Ryan begins slicing the roast beef, that was the most popular meat they sold. "Finally, music?" Audrey offers her iPod, taking a minute to turn on the shuffle button. Closing Time plays through the tinny little speakers, both teenagers quietly singing along as they set up the deli for the day.  
The bell rings as the front doors open. "We're close- nevermind," Audrey smiles and Ryan looks up, Spencer walking over and putting his stuff in the back. "We're listening to Semisonic now?" He asks as he ties on his own apron, taking up slicing the loaves bread they had. "Yep," Audrey says, defensively setting her iPod closer so Spencer couldn't change it. The three nod their heads to the music, Ryan's lips still moving as he mouths song and Audrey hums along to it. The Anthe comes on next, Audrey bouncing to it now. Ryan sings along, bobbing his head as he does, pointing at Spencer as he does. Spencer laughs as he finishes up, cleaning the machine off before he snatches the iPod from Audrey, looking through the song queue, changing it a bit as he nods his head along to the song.  
Audrey hums along to the Lifestyles of The Rich & Famous as Ryan watches Spencer pretend two older baguettes were drumsticks, acting as if he was playing the drums. Ryan grins as he cleans up the slicer he had been using, putting the sampled meat into the little plastic box thing. He laughs as he gets whacked in the ass with a baguette, looking at Spencer who wiggles his eyebrows suggestively. "Spencer, I'm gonna shove this baguette up yours," Ryan says, still grinning as he grabs it from the boy and brandishes it wildly at him. Spencer yelps and darts off, causing both Ryan and Audrey to burst into laughter as he does.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's taken so long! Hope yall enjoy

"Ry what are you doing?" Brendon asks as Ryan stretches out on his bed, his legs up against the wall as he holds a pillow. "I am stretching, see? Stretcchhh" He points his toes as he arches his back dramatically. Brendon laughs and walks over, sitting next to Ryan and kisses his forehead gently. "Hi, there" He runs his fingers through Ryan's hair and he sighs happily. "I love you," Brendon says softly and Ryan turns his head to lean into him quietly. His eyes shut as he tries to figure out a way to respond to Brendon, he decides just to stay quiet as he leans into him, sighing softly as Brendon's fingers run over his spine slowly.  
"I have to go home soon," Ryan says with a small pout. "No, stay here" Brendon kisses him gently, obviously trying to convince him to stay. "I gotta go hon, me and dad are having dinner for once. But I'll call you later" He says and kisses Brendon's jaw lightly, sighing happily as he does. "I'll miss you" Brendon pouts. "I'll miss you too" He grins and kisses him gently, cupping his cheek as he does.  
Brendon kisses back, his hand on Ryan's hip gently as he does. He relaxes a bit as Ryan kisses him, his fingers running through his hair gently as he smiles against his lips. "Okay babe, I gotta go" Ryan moves off the bed and pulls his shoes and jacket back on. Brendon hugs him tightly before Ryan grabs his backpack and walks outside. He starts walking quickly, heads down as he walks back home. It was colder than it had been last week, just bordering the high 30s but it still hasn't snowed. Only Vegas would get cold but not provide the one nice thing about the winter and Christmastime, snow.

Ryan unlocks the front door, smiling faintly when he smells food instead of alcohol. He heads upstairs to ditch his backpack and plug his phone in before heading back downstairs. "What are we having?" He asks as he leans against the wall, watching his dad cook. "Steak and potatoes" The man responds as he keeps one eye on the steak, smiling at Ryan who was currently searching the fridge for something to drink. "Did we run out of dr pepper?" He asks as he looks at his dad. "Uh yeah but I got a new thing of it, just didn't put it in the fridge" George responds as he looks back at the stove.  
Ryan puts some cans in the fridge and opens one, sipping it while it was still intensely bubbling and would tickle his nose. He holds back a sneeze as he looks out of the window, beginning to zone out as some leaves fall from the tree in the backyard. He jolts when he hears a knock at the door, setting the can down and walking to the living room. He swings the door open, mood dropping when he sees Jac. "Why are you here?" Ryan asks quietly as he watches her. "I just...I wanted to talk. Can I come in?" She asks. "No, we're about to have dinner. You're not invited." He says, crossing his arms. "Fine. I wanted to ask if.. well yknow, if you and Brendon are a thing?" She asks, raising an eyebrow. He moves closer to the door so his dad didn't here, getting anxious from her words. "No, why would you think that?" Ryan shakes his head as he frowns at her, fingers crossed behind his back as he looks at her.  
"Well.. you two have been inseparable and people have seen you two getting really close for just friends," She says and crosses her arms. "No, we're not, do you need anything else or are you just here to investigate my sexuality?" He asks as he frowns at her, closing her off once again. "Just that... I guess, yeah. Okay, well..yknow if you are you should tell the truth" She says as she steps back then heads back down to the sidewalk. "I'm not!" Ryan yells after her and shuts the door behind him, sighing anxiously as he does. His fingers run through his hair as he sighs slowly, leaning his head back against the door as his eyes shut. "Fuck" He whispers.  
He walks back into the kitchen, sitting down as his dad sets the plates down. "You okay kid?" He asks as he looks at Ryan with concern. "Yeah I'm fine" Ryan smiles at him, beginning to eat quickly to avoid speaking. "Who was it at the door?" George asks, eating slowly. "Uh, just someone from school. No one important" Ryan shrugs as he looks at him, tapping on the table as he sighs nervously. "Okay then" George slowly nods and looks back down at his plate, still eating slowly as Ryan zones out, over chewing his steak as he tries to figure out how to come to terms with his sexuality and blooming relationship.

Ryan lays his head on the cafeteria table, eyes closed until a tray slams next to his head. He jolts up and looks at Brendon who was viciously going through his backpack. "Uh, Bren are you okay?" Ryan touches his shoulder, earning a smack to the hand. "Okay, what did I do?" Ryan asks, confused as he looks at his boyfriend. "You denied we were a thing!" Brendon says, his voice low and angry. "Why would you do that? Are you that ashamed of me?" Brendon rants at Ryan who just waits for him to be finished. "Brendon," He says to catch his attention. "Jac confronted me at my house and my dad could've heard, I haven't come out to him yet and I didn't want that to be the way I did, okay?" He says softly as he looks at the boy who slowly nods. "Fine. But if anyone else asks you're gonna tell them we are right?" He says softly. "Yes, I will. I promise" Ryan kisses his forehead gently.  
Jac frowns at him and he narrows his eyes at her, challenging her to come over and whine like she always did. She looks away and he lays his head on Brendon's, watching him eat quietly. He runs his fingers through his hair as he sighs softly. "I love you," Ryan says, his voice quiet as he does. Brendon immediately looks up, it was the first time the boy had said that. "I love you too" He smiles and kisses him quickly before turning back to this food. Ryan smiles as he leans his head on his boyfriend's, shutting his eyes as he relaxes against him.  
Brendon finishes and wraps his arms around Ryan's waist, nuzzling into his neck as he sighs slowly. "Come over to my house after school," He says against Ryan's skin. "Of course" Ryan nods and runs his fingers through his hair gently and smiles a bit as he does. "Good, I need you" Brendon sighs in relief as he hugs him closer, eyes shut as he nuzzles into his neck tiredly. "Cmon, we've got some time before class" He collects Brendon's tray and throws away the extra food, setting the tray on top of the trash and leads him out. Brendon holds onto his hand as the two head off to an empty classroom to cuddle up for a bit and make out, their usual after lunch plans. Ryan settles down, holding Brendon in his lap as Brendon lays his head on his shoulder tiredly. He kisses Ryan's neck chastely as his fingers run over Brendon's spine slowly. "I don't wanna ever let you go," He says softly to the boy on his lap, eyes shutting as he does. "Please never do" Brendon whispers back. his arms wrapped around him tightly.

Ryan and Brendon lay on Brendon's floor, Ryan's arms around the smaller boys' waist and his lips pressed against Brendon's. He cups his cheek gently as he kisses him, eyes shutting once again as he runs his fingers along his cheekbone slowly. "This is perfect" Brendon whispers as he looks up at Ryan. "It's absolutely perfect" Ryan smiles at him as his fingers run through his hair slowly. "Can we stay like this forever?" Brendon asks. "Whatever you'd like baby" Ryan smiles as he lays his head down on the rug, just watching Brendon as he smiles, running his fingers over Ryan's chest. The two were so immersed in their own little world neither notice Ryan's phone light up with a message from Jac, telling him that she was telling everyone about him and Brendon unless he came to her house and talked with her.  
Brendon's lips press to the hollow of Ryan's throat as his eyes shut, Ryan's lips parting as he gently holds the back of Brendon's neck, his thumb running over the side of it gently. "Forever" Brendon whispers.


End file.
